Places

I am having another life crisis after looking at that Vermont position.

I really love Vermont. I have such strong New England ties, I love the Land and the people, I love the culture. It’s so free and liberal and open. I feel like if I could wrap all of the things that I think and believe into a bundle and fit them somewhere it would be into Vermont.

But then there’s Baltimore. How did I let Baltimore creep up on me? I would never have thought of this place as somewhere I wanted to live. Not like I think of Belize, Guatemala, Italy, Montreal, and Greece. Those places have always sat in the back of my mind like little maps. They are places that I Google every month or so hoping airfare will drop to $200 and I will suddenly have everything I need to just go.

I can guarantee Baltimore wasn’t ever a Google search before last March. Now I love it too. I attend United Workers meetings, and people know my name. I get cups of coffee with Important People at Cool Coffee Shops. I attend film showings and know the ins and outs of the free art movement. I know which Farmer’s Market stall sells the most delicious kale and am building up my rooftop garden from the plants sold by my favorite vendor.

I have a church. It’s not the edgy church that I imagined myself finding. But those feel so fake anyway. It’s big, and it’s small. We have a small group that does potluck brunches and takes hikes along rivers. I go there and I hear and I drink up what our pastor says. The music is full of earth and air.

So, I am torn. I want to travel. I want to see new people and new places. South America is on the menu, definitely. But I also want a home. My feet need somewhere to sink into. I need a little space of my own and a city, or village, to call my own. Here in Baltimore I pass people on the street and know them. They ask about me and we smile. I know that Red Emmas has the best Miso Soup I’ve ever tasted and that the happy hour deals on Sushi in this city can’t be beat. I know how to find cheap yoga classes and where to go for live music. I am excited about urban gardening and the Bmore Food Not Lawns movement. I know people. I am beginning to have friends.

Here I have been myself. I haven’t lied about Faith or Food or Family. I have laughed more than I ever thought I would. I’ve gone to lectures and met people and Done Things in ways that don’t feel forced or fake or Not Me. I know I couldn’t do that in Boston, and I know I couldn’t do that at Home. I’ve begun to Trust Myself.

And yet Vermont stands. It is itself and it is in me. It is Freedom and Food Justice and silly old tractors left out in the field. It is Family, which can’t be left behind. New cousins I haven’t seen and young brothers that are almost moving on. It is past troubles and it is my very first garden. So what do I do with that?

I will just throw out a million nets. Big nets that reach all the way from Peru to Nova Scotia, from Baltimore to Greece. I’ll wait until they fill way way up and then see what I’ve brought in. Who knows where I will be in August.

april showers bring potted flowers

Maslenitsa

on tuesday night we had a very important guest. mr. bill mccarthy joined us over a delicious meal. since we are in the lively week of maslenitsa, leading up to lent, i thought it would be fun to have a russian feast! it was scrumptuous.

we had blini - блины
sauteed mushrooms and spinach - грибами и шпинатом
beet salad - винегрет
potato salad - картофельный салат
sour cream - сметана
blueberries - черника
maple syrup - кленовый сироп
jam - варенье
wine - вина (thank you bill!) and, of course,

водка

it was a lovely night, with lots of laughs, delicious food and fond memories of the motherland (for me...*sigh*). i miss russia a lot these days. i miss traveling, and am looking forward to potential travels around the world, but miss the comfortableness of having found friends and a place that i knew. it will be hard to start again anywhere, as it always is.

where in the world will i go next?

can you imagine having a yoga class here?
i can!
last night allison and i wandered over to baltimore's lavish conservatory for an evening of yoga with an instructor from charm city yoga, my home studio. we arrived early and strolled through the tropical room, the dessert room, the orchid room...

the class was slow and peaceful and was followed by a time of walking meditation through the night-filled conservatory.

there is even a conservatory cat who lives among the tropical plants and probably destresses the giant goldfish swimming languidly in their pool.

a gathering

1

tuesday we had a scrumptuous gathering. 15 people gathered around good food and passionate ideas. two men from baltimore's united workers
came to our home to share their stories and the stories of the struggles faced by low wage and temp workers from baltimore to egypt. the conversation and questions were both troubling and inspiring. i hope that something good will come out of it. both for the united workers and for our guests and ourselves.

Give Me S'more Cupcakes!

Once upon a time I got in the mood for cupcakes. I looked through my cookbooks and nothing looked peppy enough. Even my Vegan With a Vengence book didn't help. I was missing some key ingredients. I've tried to be innovative with baking before, and it's fallen through. This time, though, it worked. Isa Chandra Moskowitz gave me a helpful springboard in her Vegan Cupcakes take Over the World. I don't own the book, but have baked from my sister's copy before. This time I looked it up on good old Google Books.

I still didn't have all of the ingredients. I had to improvise. Here's what happened: delicious, nutty, fluffy S'more cupcakes that melted in our mouths. We nibbled on them while watching Glee and couldn't stop raving about them (even while Kurt's Valentine sang his romantic failure of a song, breaking all of our hearts for Kurt, if only for a moment).

Nutty S'more Cupcakes
¾ c brown sugar
¼ c cashew or peanut butter, melted
¼ c canola oil
1 ½ c milk alternative
2 T apple cider vinegar
2 tsp maple syrup
1 c whole wheat flour
1 tsp baking powder
½ tsp baking soda
1 tsp cinnamon
¼ tsp cloves
¼ tsp powdered ginger
¾ c graham cracker crumbs

Icing:
1/4 - 1/3 c milk alternative
1/4 c earth balance
1/4 c peanut butter
1/4 c graham cracker crumbs
1/2 c powdered sugar, as needed

1/4 c organic dark chocolate shavings

How To:
Preheat oven to 350. Grease muffin tin.
Mix brown sugar, melted nut butter, oil, milk alternative, vanilla, and apple cider vinegar in a large bowl.
Combine flour, baking powder, baking soda, spices, and salt into a separate bowl and mix. Add graham cracker crumbs. Mix well.

Add dry ingredients to wet in three batches, mixing well each time.

Fill each muffin tin ¾ of the way full. Bake for 22-25 minutes, or until toothpick, knife, or other utensil inserted comes out clean. Transfer to cooling rack and let cool completely before icing (my problem with patience is clearly apparent here).

For Icing
Mix together earth balance, soy milk and peanut butter well. Add powdered sugar by the tablespoon, mixing well, until a thin icing is formed. Add graham cracker crumbs. Mix well. Refrigerate until cupcakes are cooled.

Assembly:
Slather a generous amount of icing on top of the cupcakes. Sprinkle generously with grated chocolate. Add a broken off corner of a graham cracker for an added flourish. Serve immediately and enjoy!


I'm making these again on Tuesday for our United Workers Open House. Pictures to follow.